If I were dictator, cont'd

If I were dictator, here are some of the things I would outlaw immediately (feel free to chime in with your own verbotens):

* When you disagree with someone, you have to say "I disagree" or similar words, in all charity and politeness, of course. You are not permitted to say, "I hear you," out of fear of appearing rigid, narrow-minded and dogmatic.

* It is no longer permitted to say, "is all," at the end of sentences. So: "I was just waiting for my friend Bob, that's all."

* News stories are no longer permitted to pretend to neutrality or objectivity. Stories critical of the government or the Church will remain perfectly legal and protected, of course, but you can't write a news story about Pope Benedict XVI and then stick on a snotty reference at the end about"his ban on birth control" or "his rigid reputation" as the "Enforcer/Rottweiler/Panzer Kardinal" or "Vatican crackdown," etc. In other words, hating the guts of a public figure or institution representing conservative values is fine; faking that you don't is not.

* Note to Bill O'Reilly: No more triumphantly proclaiming "what Jesus would do." Jesus is God. We don't know what He would do. The claim is usually made to justify a liberal or permissive course of action. (The WWJD fad is very well-meant, but kind of misleading. I know I've just flayed a sacred cow alive.)